Just looking for similar experience/advice:
So I'm almost 4mths PP and I love my new son just as much as my first born, who's just turned 9. My partner works away on very long stints (although has been home for 5 months now because of COVID).
I don't really remember how I felt after giving birth to my first born but I am struggling at the moment.
I feel worthless. I feel like I'm no where near as important to anyone else as they are to me.
My 9 year old is a beautiful kid, don't get me wrong, but as typical as a 9 year old he points out what I'm not doing, or haven't done. Without seeing how much I bend over backwards to make sure he doesn't feel Sharfted after being numero-uno for so long.
My husband is a wonderful man, he provides exceptionally well for our family and he's a good dad. And I don't mean to be upset and angry with him, but I wish he would just see me, for me.
He's just come home from a boys weekend, which I do not begrudge him for at all! He deserves it. But I'm so jealous. He's never wanted to drive up the beach before, but he jumped at the chance to go with them. Even to a spot I've suggested before. I'm so happy he got away and enjoyed himself, but I wish it was with me.
I've lost friends because all their kids are older, and I now have a baby it's a bit of a mood killer.
My high school best friend didn't even want to meet my new baby.
My jobs have been taken over while I've been on leave and so my importance/need there has gone.
Plus on top of everything else Let's throw COVID isolation in there too.
I feel I've lost me, and I'm scared I'm falling down the depression sinkhole. I've done the tests and I'm not there yet but I can feel I'm starting to fall.
I know the obvious of seeking medical help which I have an appointment to do, but any personal pointers? What helped? What stern talking to did you give yourself?